By: Iyo_embong

We sometimes assume that we have fully repented and made amends when we have said we are ‘sorry‘.   But there is a side to being sorry that is more serious than mere polite apology.   And   there are circumstances in which much more than ‘casual regret’ is called for.

I remember when my brother Chris was still studying in highschool when his classmate hit him because he did not allow him to copy his homework. My mother requested a meeting with the school principal and the boy involved. To my Mum’s surprise this boy so happened to be under the care of the Archbishop of Cebu who was also present in this meeting. Of course the boy asked for apology (what else do you expect), but guess what? Trust my Mum (God bless her heart), she asked this simple question; “If I smash that chair into you head and say sorry afterwards, is that alright and will you forgive me?.” The room was so quite you can even hear a pin dropped, trust me given a chance my Mum would do that as well.

Saying… we’re sorry, doesn’t undo physical damage.  Saying…we’re sorry, doesn’t restore things that are lost. Saying… we’re sorry, doesn’t always heal a broken heart.  It ‘may’ help!.  Certainly, saying we’re sorry … is a gesture in the right direction.  But it isn’t necessarily ‘real repentance‘. Real repentance is something beyond the repetition of a ready-made phrase.  Sometimes people are repentant only to the point of being concerned about consequences.  Sometimes a supposed repentance is prompted principally by fear, and passes as soon as the fear passes. People often know full well the probable penalties of some of the things they do. But they sometimes, decide to take a chance and hope the gamble will go in their favour.  And if it doesn’t they say they’re sorry.

Of course a person is sorry when he is faced with unpleasant facts and possible penalties! And for the moment, at least, he may seem to be really “repentant.” But ‘real repentance’ is more than being embarrassed, and it is more than the fear of consequences.  Real repentance must include a man’s admission to himself that he knows he has done what he shouldn’t have done, that he is earnestly and inwardly sorry, and will make an honest effort to make amends. If he is wise, he will have learned his lesson. If he isn’t he may be sorry again and again – and go on singing the same sorrowful song.

In short, when someone says he is sorry, the crux of the question is: Is he sincerely sorry, or is he merely professing repentance? To be convincing, there are many things a man must do besides saying he’s sorry. He can’t perhaps always undo the damage, but to be convincing he “must” say he is ‘sorry’ with a changed course of conduct.

By: Iyo_embong