© Written by Adam V

I often hear with some peoples relationships and have heard with my own “you should break up”. Your partner did something so bad or somethings happened and now your thinking its over.

Hold on.

Now see there’s an old saying. It goes “its easier to break things than it is to fix them”. Now while that’s true for your things like a bone or something as simple as an iPhone screen, should that really be true for relationships or friendships. I mean should a simple misstep, a feeling or a feeling that hasn’t been there for while be enough to break a relationship that in some cases took years to build. I mean would a few rain storms make you pack your bags and leave a place that gave you pretty good sunshine all year round.

Its seems to be human nature to put more credibility into negative emotions than positive ones.

We’ve all felt it, when something bad happens we want to end it all. The situation is so close, right up in our face that becomes all that we can see. Then the comparing mind pops up and we start thinking “hey maybe the grass is greener on the other side”, but what if we watered our own lawn? See we have to retrain ourselves to not put so much stock into our feelings and emotions during these intense times because they are not true and if we are not careful it will control us. We have to take a step back, reflect and respond, not react so we don’t make the all too common mistake of making a permanent decision from a temporary emotion.

Don’t be a victim of the victims story.

You know the victims story ‘what they did to you’, ‘how they did wrong by you’, the more you tell the story to yourself and your friends, the angrier and more justified you become. Don’t forget about what they did for you or with you. Equally weigh the good.

What if you had to be a defense attorney for your partner? Could you think of a solid argument on their behalf? I bet you could. Now don’t get me wrong. This does not apply to consistent mental or physical abuse. I think there are deal breakers. But nowadays in this society, we just kill relationships so fast. When something bad happens, we go and abandon ship. But that “bad” if we don’t run from it but instead go towards it, could be a hidden opportunity to become stronger and more intimate with your partner than ever before.

To know them on a deeper level than ever before. So look at the whole picture.

Approaching different situations with this perspective allows you to make a mature decision, not from a place of ego, not from a place of pain but from a place of love.

Whether you choose to save the relationship or let it go you will know you have made the right decision. Because love contrary to popular belief is not blind.

It has 20/20 vision.

So take the time and space you need to make the wise decision.

Because love will never steer you wrong. I promise you.

© Written by Adam V