By: Iyo_Embong

Aside from death, the other certainty in life is the various twists and turns of fate we all are subject to before taking that final breath. The twists in my life were not an exception. Like many of us, lately life has been very challenging for me and during this time you will certainly know who your true friend is. The people that you’ve help or lent money to, you’re so called friends – they’ve all disappeared. Eric Clapton was right in one of his song “Nobody knows you when you’re down and out”. But in the midst of it, I had a visit from my friend Ian Manly last week who made this profound comment to me; “Ed, if we are going to fight for $5,000.00 I will give you the $5,000.00 just to save our friendship”…. I was blown away and was really touched by that statement.

A while ago, I came across a definition of “friend” as another body sharing the same soul. As ethereal as it may seem, the definition elicits visions of a bond between one person and another, regardless of sex, religion, upbringing, and ethnic background, sense of purpose, among others.

While some have several friends, others can barely count with their fingers those they can really share their souls with. For some, friendship can start after the first informal contact. Others take a longer time to nurture and develop it. In very rare cases, friendship is just there all the time, waiting for the right circumstances to make its presence felt.

Deeper than the “fiscal crisis” we are facing is the moral crisis that pervades our society today. Values such as honesty, integrity and diligence are now seen as old fashioned and things of the past. Everybody, as in everybody, is out to make money, whatever money, whoever’s money, and the end result is that the rich and powerful become richer, and the poor become poorer. The lure of fast, easy money has led so many astray. Never have so few have it so good, while so many have it so difficult, as in our present day and time.

Remember the story of the Greek philosopher Diogenes who went around with a lamp in the broad daylight looking for a good man in Greece? According to rumors, he has been recently seen again going to different countries looking for good men. He was recently seen, according to reports, sitting down in a street corner somewhere in Asia, feeling so dejected. When asked why, he was reported to have said: “I not only had a hard time looking for good men. I even lost my lamp!” Where, oh where, are the good men and women? Where, oh where, are the lamps, the “salt of the earth,” the “light of the world” in our land?

“When in doubt, tell the truth.” This is a very good rule that leads to peace. Lying leads to agony in the long run. In the “short run,” it may lead to glory but, as you and I know, glory is not forever. People who cover lies will have to cover, and will have to continue to cover many, many more lies. He/she who tells a lie will have to try to remember all the time what he told.

Deal with “truth decay” as you would with tooth decay. If your tooth is aching, you don’t deny it, you don’t sanitize it, you don’t rationalize it, you don’t postpone it. No, you deal with it, and you deal with it fast and radically. As with tooth decay, the only way you deal with truth decay is to open up.

As we go about our lives, we encounter different levels of good.

• The first is the level of LOOKING GOOD. This is the level which we are busy with most of the time. What others say is what matters on this level.
• The second level is FEELING GOOD. This is the level where what we say or feel about ourselves is the center of our attention.
• The third level is that of DOING GOOD. There is a value outside as that makes us do good things.
• Then there is the level of simply BEING GOOD. This is the level where goodness emanates from a heart. The problem with many of us is that we put priority over looking good, and feeling good over doing good and being good. Just be good and everything else will follow.

Abraham Lincoln has a beautiful reminder for all of us, who live in a world so full of hypocrisy and sincerity: “I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true; I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live up to the light I have; I must stand with anybody that stands right, stand with him while he is right, and part with him when he goes wrong.”

Too often, we think of hypocrisy as the deceit of bad people pretending to be good. However, the opposite could also be the same, that of good people pretending to be bad. That’s true. I know a lot of people who are really good but keep pretending and acting as if they are bad. I don’t know why they do so. Is it because they think that being good is a sign of weakness? There is no greater strength than goodness and gentleness of heart.

At the end of the day when everything is quiet, we will be left alone with ourselves, minus our titles, positions and possessions, minus our masks and put-ons. When money comes into the picture, the purest and cleanest thoughts, convictions and even values can become obscured. When money talks, people begin to lose their sense of sight, hearing, speaking and even their sense of feeling.

By: Iyo_Embong 2012©Copyright. Any distribution, reproduction or copying of any part of this article is forbidden. If you wish to use this article please only use the first 2-3 lines as an excerpt and link back directly to the article along with the Authors name.